I started this blog as a kind of self therapy. Many of the books I've read all tout the same advice about writing down your day to day activities so that you can look back at your own personal progress. That would have worked had I posted a bit more often than I have been. I never really was much of a writer -high school English class was not one of my strongest subjects. I guess I was partly inspired by some of the other blogs out there that I had been reading (thanks criseyde). Reading and wishing that I had such an interesting life that I could share with the world in some way. What is it they say about one mans trash? Lately I've come to feel though that I do have an interesting life and believe me it keeps getting even more interesting every day, there are lots of things that I really don't think I should put up here lol. I really think a turning point came after I read Randy Pausch's book (The Last Lecture) -yes you can watch the video online but ask a book reader and they will always say the book was better. Maybe it was just really good timing, maybe my mind was in just the right place when I read it but it woke something up inside me, it erased the apprehension, the fear. OK fine it lit a fire under my ass!
My earlier posts were laced with me trying to change my usual approach to dating (total failure on all levels if you haven't guessed) and finally getting 'in the game' as it were. How embarrassing it all looks now. The change in outlook on my life have pulled a total 180. I am no where near the same person I was back then in many ways and I think all of those changes were for the better. No longer am I the shy one that drops his head when he sees a cutie on the subway. No more am I the self conscious guy that doubts himself all the friggin time. I remember seeing a show on TV, I can't remember what it was all about but there was a section about this young guy who needed some cash for school -don't let your mind wander now, stay with me. He saw an ad for a modeling position or maybe a friend suggested it, it's not quite clear. When he arrived at the studio it turned out to be a sketching class and he was to be the nude model. I remember at the time how mortified I would have felt if that were me, no friggin way would I have gone through with that! But I find now that I would probably be just fine with it, I'd probably enjoy it! That's the level of change that I'm talking about, a complete 180.
I'm still training hard, still working towards my goal of getting on stage next year (there's another thing that used to freak me out, getting on stage in a teeny tiny little gitch that doesn't really leave much to the imagination). I've just really started offseason training so that means more food heavy! heavy! heavy! and lots of epsom salt baths! As I said, I've only just started offseason and I'm jazzed to say that I'm pretty much right back where I left off last offseason benching 315lbs, still squating and deadlifting 405 but those are getting easier each day. My weight is currently sitting at 201lbs and I intend to stay as lean as possible this year. The leaner I am come preseason, the easier it is to get lean for the stage and the less stress I have to endure. It's a win on all levels.
If you have any questions on training, diet or supplements, please don't hesitate to write me. I may not have all the answers or the answer that you want to hear but I swear I won't bullshit you.
Anyways, that's all for now. Maybe we'll bump into each other over at Wicked (oh, but that's another story).....
My earlier posts were laced with me trying to change my usual approach to dating (total failure on all levels if you haven't guessed) and finally getting 'in the game' as it were. How embarrassing it all looks now. The change in outlook on my life have pulled a total 180. I am no where near the same person I was back then in many ways and I think all of those changes were for the better. No longer am I the shy one that drops his head when he sees a cutie on the subway. No more am I the self conscious guy that doubts himself all the friggin time. I remember seeing a show on TV, I can't remember what it was all about but there was a section about this young guy who needed some cash for school -don't let your mind wander now, stay with me. He saw an ad for a modeling position or maybe a friend suggested it, it's not quite clear. When he arrived at the studio it turned out to be a sketching class and he was to be the nude model. I remember at the time how mortified I would have felt if that were me, no friggin way would I have gone through with that! But I find now that I would probably be just fine with it, I'd probably enjoy it! That's the level of change that I'm talking about, a complete 180.
I'm still training hard, still working towards my goal of getting on stage next year (there's another thing that used to freak me out, getting on stage in a teeny tiny little gitch that doesn't really leave much to the imagination). I've just really started offseason training so that means more food heavy! heavy! heavy! and lots of epsom salt baths! As I said, I've only just started offseason and I'm jazzed to say that I'm pretty much right back where I left off last offseason benching 315lbs, still squating and deadlifting 405 but those are getting easier each day. My weight is currently sitting at 201lbs and I intend to stay as lean as possible this year. The leaner I am come preseason, the easier it is to get lean for the stage and the less stress I have to endure. It's a win on all levels.
If you have any questions on training, diet or supplements, please don't hesitate to write me. I may not have all the answers or the answer that you want to hear but I swear I won't bullshit you.
Anyways, that's all for now. Maybe we'll bump into each other over at Wicked (oh, but that's another story).....
A.
I’ve stumbled across you blog a couple of times so I thought I would follow it and see what other interesting things you have to say. Personally, I cannot comment much on your dating woes (I got lucky and met my wife at work and she’s a perfect match for me) but I do share your passion for fitness and hope to read more posts on that topic. On the dating side of things, I will say that two good couple friends of ours met online and it’s worked out very well for them both… so hang in there! As far as weight-training and bodybuilding goes, I have often considered the idea of stepping on stage myself someday. And like you have in the past, I have my doubts. For me, it’s one of those things where I begin to ask myself “Why am I doing this? Is it all just about looking good while I mow the lawn or should I actually find out what the judges have to say?” I wish you the best in your plans to compete and I’m looking forward to hearing (reading) more about your experience in achieving your goals. And who knows... maybe along the way, I’ll grow a pair and decide to finally go for it myself. Take care.
ReplyDeleteKirk
Hey Kirk,
ReplyDeleteWell isn't this a surprise! When I started doing this blog it was actually just for something to do and a bit of self therapy. Not having someone around to bounce your days and experiences off of can drive people to start talking to themselves which is what I started to do lol. I knew I had to start doing something else and writing it down by hand wasn't a good choice as my handwriting sucks. I had never really intended to build any kind of followership (is that a word?) I even went so far as to make sure my blog wasn't listed anywhere. I've told no one else that I'm doing this, no friends no family no one. I was a little surprised when I saw your comments on a couple of posts but in all truth, I'm really OK with other people reading my rants now. I do sometimes get personal (like my latest post, you should get a kick out of that one) so I'm still not sure about family reading this stuff. Just don't get the wrong idea and think I'm a complete disaster lol this place is somewhere to vent when things get to be too much BS or if I came across something that I'd like to remember in the future.
Thanks for following. I'll try to post some more gym stuff and of course the competition stuff as well.
Now to decide whether I should change the publishing settings on the blog. Should I open it up to the world? Decisions decisions.
Hey man, thanks for writing back. I say go ahead and open it up to the world. The way I look at it is if someone comes to your blog and reads what you write, it was their decision to stop by and they can always leave if they don't like it. But either way, keep posting and I'll try to keep up... and I hope you don't mind me commenting once in a while. Just look at it like having someone around to bounce your days and experiences off of. Take care.
ReplyDeleteKirk
Jeez, look at that stupid grin on my face... I think it's time for me to change my profile pic.